So I have a feeling this post may be somewhat controversial. However, if it helps at least one woman out there battling with choices in IF, treatments, procedures...then I think it is worth it. Do any of you read a blog and want to say something, but do not feel like it is your place? So many times I have read a post and it ends with "What do you think?" or "What should I do?" I have always avoided these questions because I am certainly not a dr. I understand that every couple and every case is different. But is there anything out there that is said where you just want to scream "Don't do it!" or "Stop!"
Well I do. It is always with IUI vs. IVF. I understand that IUI is less invasive, less time consuming, and certainly less expensive. I think that IUI is definitely one of the the first routes to go (unless there are issues such as blocked tubes), but when is enough...enough? How many cycles is enough?
I have had several IUI cycles. I have been pregnant 5 times (4 from IUI, 1 naturally)...still no baby in our arms. I wish someone would have told me Stop after the 3rd....5th....8th...
So ....what do you guys think? How many IUI's is enough before you move on to IVF, adopt, or throw in the towel? If you or someone you know was successful with IUI, how many IUI cycles did it take them before being successful? I do not mind being proven wrong. I actually would love to hear that someone after several IUI's was finally successful and has a healthy happy baby. I would love to hear that I was not crazy for trying so many times. But if I am not...then I want to help someone else out there that is in the IUI phase of IF.
I have almost deleted this post several times because I really do not want to offend anyone. THIS IS NOT MY INTENT and I am very sorry if I have.
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Thank you for writing this post.
ReplyDeleteAs you know I am struggling with this very decision. Every time we think we need to do IVF IUI's just aren't working I think "but what if it's this time". I hate living my life by "what if"
I will be honest with you--I skipped right over IUI and went straight to IVF. Our issue is male factor and Dr. wanted to try IUI (no more than 3 times) before moving to IVF. My thoughts were that I would rather spend the money on IVF because our chances were better--than to try to do IUI more than once and still end up doing IVF. So I understand what you are saying. I will say that my Doctor felt that once you have done IUI three times and it hasn't worked--it's probably time to move on. But I know that all doctors are different as well as everyone's situations are different.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine that anyone would be offended by your post. No worries--and best wishes!
PS--I don't have an IVF result yet. First retrieval on Wednesday. :)
I totally understand why you wrote this post! I went through 10 IUIs because of our doctor's recommendation - 2 resulted in BFP but I miscarried. Now looking back I wish we would have tried IUI two or three times then moved on to IVF. I feel like we wasted valuable time and emotions on the months of IUIs.
ReplyDeletehttp://doihavetobeadink.blogspot.com/
you're not offending anyone!! from all that i've seen from reading your blog, you are methodical and go step by step. PLUS, you are patient and level headed. i say these things bc you've done the multiple iui's vs skipping straight to ivf, and bc various choices you made during ivf and more recently, the patience you're showing with this upcoming FET. part of me regrets not trying a few iui's first, but given the male factor issue, and my urgency in wanting a baby (ugh, urgency sounds dumb, doesn't it??), we skipped straight to ivf. part of me will always wonder if i could've spared myself the pain of the first ivf by having done iui's instead. our plan now is to do ivf #2 in july, and if it doesn't work. i am going to do back to back iui's for the next YEAR. yup, i'm gonna keep doing them for a year bc i can't fathom jumping into an ivf #3 this year, and also bc i feel like at some point (assuming surgery did fix dh's SA numbers), that iui should take. just not as fast as ivf would obviously.
ReplyDeleteso, i really envy you that you did things in order. i think you did everything the *smart* way instead of jumping prematurely. you crossed off each tic on the chart one by one before getting to ivf, and i totally think you should be proud of yourself not having the approach of "i want a baby and i want one NOW no matter waht" that most of us girls start this process with.
The ultimate goal is to get a healthy baby, but there are a few other successes along the way like getting pregnant.
ReplyDeleteI have done a couple IUI's now (both Neg) and have 2 more planned per recommendation of our RE. I think I would do IUI as our preferred method if I was getting pregnant. So far I'm not.
I would consider that they work for you because you are getting pregnant, but I also understand, getting pregnant is only part of the process. Duh, you want a healthy baby so go with what you feel is right.
We aren't dealing with MFI, and we did 3 IUI's (all bfn) before moving to IVF. Not sure if we will do any more IUI's- I think we are done with ART for a while...
ReplyDeleteIt is your blog sweetie so post whatever you want. I actually do know of one woman who had many IUI's and she now has not one, but two children as a result. I don't know the specifics but I do know that she changed RE's and got pg the first time. I don't know if it was natural or medicated cycles, but she has two adorable children to show for it. I just think we have to rely on the advice of the expert we choose while at the same time relying on our own intuition as this is sometimes more accurate than science, at least in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteWe skipped right over IUI's because of blocked tubes and Hubby's less than awesome sperm. But I think my clinic recommends 3 IUI's before moving on to IVF. I think it's great that you bring this up! We were glad that our RE was up front with us. We felt good knowing that we weren't going to spend more money and time then we needed to on treatments that wouldn't have worked for us.
ReplyDeleteI am proud of you for having the guts to write this....you know I feel the same way. I wish my old RE would have done the Kruger SA so we would have known about DH's low morphology. We would have moved right to IVF and not wasted anymore money, time, and hope on IUI's. Oh well we live and learn!!!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree, no harm at all in putting this out there. We did 4 IUIs and honestly I was done after about 2. We wasted time and money that could have gone to IVF since (although we didn't know at the time) that was where we were headed anyways. I know people do get their BFPs from IUIs but I personally would have rather pulled out the big guns so to speak after the first couple BFNs, especially since we knew hubby had a morphology issue. Live and learn is right I guess!
ReplyDeleteI don't find this offensive at all! We did 7 IUIs...my tubes were blocked at first, but they cleaned them out during one of my laps. I really wish I would have gone to IVF earlier because, as it turns out, my eggs suck and DH's sperm sucks. So basically, we spent the equivalent of 1 IVF cycle on IUI's...never a BFP. I guess every case is different and you may never know what the actual problem is until they look at everything under a microscope with IVF. If I had it to do over again, I would have only done 3-4 IUIs.
ReplyDeleteI didn't find it offensive at all either. ;) I had always said/thought a couple 1-2 but if it was too hard on me we'd stop. Then my RE said 3-4. F and I thought we'd probably try 3-4 after he said that but then after 2 I said I was done. I think the emotional side is a big factor too.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post, BTW I love the anniversary gift that you gave your husband, you guys are adorable. I didn't do IUI or IVF but my doctor did tell me that he would only do IUI 3 times and after that IVF. Good luck with whatever decision you make, I will be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteI'm on IUI#4 right now. Honestly? If I had the money, I never would have gotten to this point. I would have gone to IVF after 2 IUIs. Max. I am even thinking about not doing our next (and last) IUI cycle because I just don't know if I want to go through that again. I think maybe it would be time and money better spent for us to save for IVF. But that's just me. I am ready for results and I am tired of this emotional roller coaster.
ReplyDeleteHello, found your blog through my friend (Journey to the center of the uterus). This isn't offensive at all! These are really great questions you are asking. My husband and I conceived 4 babies together and all of my pregnancies ended by the 8th week. We finally decided to try clomid and after 5 cycles, we threw in the towel and moved on to adoption. We never tried IUIs or IVF because we felt we were done. My doctor said after 3 IUIs and IVFs, it is time to throw in the towel. There are woman who finally conceive after 5 cyles...I have one friend who finally conceived after 8 IVFs.
ReplyDeleteI'm a new follower and I can't wait to see what you decided. Good luck!
I don't think you are offending anyone. I am a new reader and coming at this from a different angle, but this is one thing I am extremely grateful to my doctor for. I got pregnant and miscarried twice on Femara with my obgyn. Even though I had only done 4 cycles total he refused to do another one and told me I had to go to a specialist. At the time I was really upset, I felt like it should be my decision, but he was absolutely right. We still did not do IUI, but switching to more powerful drugs helped and my third pregnancy seems to be sticking around. I know switching drugs is absolutley NOT the same as choosing IUI or IVF, but I love that my doctor forced me to stop something that was not really working.
ReplyDeleteI have always thought I would skip IUI and go straight to IVF because my insurance does not cover either. I have a friend who did 8 IUIs and never conceived (unexplained) but got pregnant on her first IVF.
Good luck on your decision, it is not easy.
I agree that this is your blog and you can post whatever you want. As for me I never had the option of IUI, since my fallopian tubes were removed. It was IVF or nothing for us, so the choice was made. I know many friends who have done numerous IUI's - some got pregnant, some did not, but usually it took at least 3 IUI's before anything went right. I always look at things as a money, emotional, and time factor. After our two IVF's went bust with Dr. A and no one (5 RE's) could figure out what was wrong with me - I decided we were done with IVF for now and moved on to adoption. At that point in our lives we both (my husband and I) could not handle the emotional/physical toll of IVF. With IVF we never knew if we would even get a baby. That is a hard thing to stomach when you have no insurance for it. With adoption it is expensive (as much as two-three IVF cycles in our case), but the end result we are going to have a baby. Adoption has been emotional as well, but the majority of the time I could see a light at the end of the tunnel. With IVF I could never see the light. Would we do IVF again? I don't know. If we did it would have to be with DE, or adopted embryo's. It would be cheaper than another adoption, but that uncertainity of whether or not it will ever work is too much for me at this time. Kudos to all the women out there who undergo multiple cycles of anything. It is a long, emotional road and it is very hard. I'm curious to see if you do a natural IVF cycle with Dr. A and how that works out. Good luck.
ReplyDelete